{"id":277,"date":"2026-06-25T13:00:31","date_gmt":"2026-06-25T17:00:31","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/michelletuesday.com\/author\/?p=277"},"modified":"2026-06-25T13:36:20","modified_gmt":"2026-06-25T17:36:20","slug":"spoons-batteries-botox-opera","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/michelletuesday.com\/author\/news\/music\/spoons-batteries-botox-opera\/","title":{"rendered":"Spoons, Batteries, Botox &amp; Opera"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Spoon Theory<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Have you all heard of spoon theory? It&#8217;s a metaphor representing the finite amount of energy that a person with a chronic illness has available in a given day. The theory is that if you waste your spoons on lower priority tasks, that you won&#8217;t have any left for the things that matter. People with chronic illness have to budget their spoons, so to speak, and plan their days carefully.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">ADHD has plagued me since my twenties at least, and some people with ADHD do struggle with energy limits, but I&#8217;m not one of them. My case of ADHD is fairly tame. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">My Evidence<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">In my early-to-mid thirties, I had a full-time 2nd-shift job in a manufacturing plant. On the side, I also worked as a church music director, taught music lessons on the weekends, and played 2.5-hour lunchtime acoustic sets at a sandwich shop six days a week. I volunteered delivering donated furniture for formerly homeless families who had recently been placed in permanent housing; ran the\u00a0&#8220;<a href=\"https:\/\/www.writing.com\/main\/forums\/item_id\/1474311-October-Novel-Prep-Challenge\">October Novel Prep Challenge<\/a>&#8221;\u00a0every October, and wrote a\u00a0novel draft\u00a0every November. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">So, I honestly can&#8217;t claim a lack of spoons back then, ADHD or not. I clearly had no limit to the number of spoons at my disposal.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">But since Parkinson&#8217;s, I now completely understand and appreciate spoon theory. However, I prefer to represent my limited energy with a battery metaphor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Batteries<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<details class=\"wp-block-details is-layout-flow wp-block-details-is-layout-flow\"><summary>If you&#8217;re not familiar, here&#8217;s a brief explanation of how Parkinson&#8217;s works.<\/summary>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><em>Healthy brains produce dopamine, which is not only the feel-good chemical you&#8217;re used to hearing about &#8211; it&#8217;s a neurotransmitter that facilitates movement. When your brain tells your muscle to move a certain way, that message is delivered by dopamine.<br><br>Parkinson&#8217;s Disease (PD) is characterized by the death of dopamine-producing brain cells and is, hence, classified as a &#8220;movement disorder&#8221;. According to my now-four years of research, by the time someone notices PD symptoms, they&#8217;ve already lost 80% of those dopamine-producing cells. Without adequate dopamine, your brain cannot send messages to your muscles, and thus, your muscles don&#8217;t work properly or at all. That results in the classic &#8220;top 4&#8221; PD symptoms of stiff muscles, tremor, balance issues, and the symptom that&#8217;s required for a PD diagnosis: bradykinesia (slow, slug-like movements which, in repetitive movements like tapping fingers together or strumming a guitar, present in decreasing amplitude and speed.)<br><br>I respond well to oral dopamine-replacement medication (&#8220;carbidopa-levadopa&#8221; or &#8220;c\/l&#8221;), but in many people, the side effects are intolerable. I&#8217;m blessed and grateful that I&#8217;m not in that camp yet (Parkinson&#8217;s is progressive, so I probably will be someday). But even with good c\/l response, the meds wear off frequently between doses, of which I take 5-6 per day.<\/em><\/p>\n<\/details>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">When my symptoms flare up between med doses, and particularly when bradykinesia kicks in, I describe it as my battery running low &#8211; or dying altogether, which is rare but does happen. In those situations, there&#8217;s nothing I can do but shuffle myself to a place to sit, take meds, and rest for 30-60 minutes until they start working. The meds are like my charger, and my battery can charge pretty much up to 100%. Then I can start tackling things again.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">However. That battery only lasts 2-4 hours before it needs another recharge.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">If I&#8217;m on top of things and take my doses before the last one wears off, it&#8217;s like plugging in your phone around 25% and working tethered to the wall for a bit. But I sometimes don&#8217;t catch it &#8217;til I&#8217;m at 5%, at which point I have to reassess my goals for the day and start scratching lower-priority items off the list. Or at least pushing them off for another day. It&#8217;s like doctor-sanctioned procrastination.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Dystonia<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">PD and\/or PD meds can cause a phenomenon called dystonia, which is where your muscles involuntarily tighten. Imagine your hand balling into a tight fist without your consent, and when you realize it and try to relax your fingers, they simply&nbsp;<em>won&#8217;t<\/em>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I suffer from dystonia in a couple distinct places in my body, the most obvious of which is&nbsp;<a class=\"\">the toes and ankle of my left foot<\/a>\u200b. When I started struggling to sing, and eventually, speak, and three laryngoscopies revealed absolutely nothing wrong other than a touch more vocal atrophy than was normal for my age*, it was reasonable to assume dystonia in my vocal cords, which we started treating quarterly with Botox injections.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<blockquote class=\"wp-block-quote has-small-font-size is-layout-flow wp-block-quote-is-layout-flow\">\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><em>*The doc said my larynx looked like it belonged to a 60-year-old instead of a 45-year-old, which isn&#8217;t unheard of but obviously is weird for a teacher and professional singer.<\/em><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Botox<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Yes, Botox is better known for its application as a smoother of wrinkles. Botulinum toxin is a paralytic, and according to&nbsp;<a href=\"https:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Botulinum_toxin\">Wikipedia<\/a>, is&nbsp;<em>&#8220;considered the deadliest known natural substance ever recorded in chemical literature<\/em>.&#8221; It basically shuts down your organs until you&#8217;re no longer alive. But in tiny, tiny doses, injected directly into the target muscle, it can relax that wrinkle right out. Or, in the case of dystonia, calm the cramp.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Muscle Stiffness<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">A few years ago, I had physical therapy for a stiff shoulder, also caused by PD. The stiffness had accumulated for at least a year. Six weeks of\u00a0<s>agony<\/s> <s>torture<\/s>\u00a0therapy loosened it right back up. Around the same time, I started my PD meds. The shoulder is still good today as a result, four years later. The meds, I assume, have prevented the stiffness from recurring.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I had quarterly Botox injections in my vocal cords for a year and a half. But I pushed back the last two appointments and ultimately canceled the last one entirely. The first few doses were great. But after that, the Botox was just making my voice weak and breathy. It relaxed the muscles\u00a0<em>too<\/em>\u00a0much. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">My theory is that my vocal cords had accumulated stiffness like my shoulder. Once the Botox relaxed the muscles enough for me to use my voice properly again, the exercise has been strengthening the muscles. Meanwhile, the meds are preventing the stiffness from coming back.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Opera<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Which brings me to&#8230; vocal training! I am so badly out of practice, and I&#8217;m&nbsp;<em>driven<\/em>. Last night, I caught myself singing along with Les Miserables, and wanted to&nbsp;<em>project<\/em>.&nbsp;Sadly, my husband and our housemate were both in bed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">So I planned to sing this afternoon. But I&#8217;ve been blogging instead. I shall go and sing now. There will be no spreadsheeting today.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Operatically,<br>Michelle<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Since Parkinson&#8217;s, I can now completely understand and appreciate spoon theory. 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